It is no doubt that adults love to travel back in time when they dine. Classic kids menu items are getting the “gourmet” make over at restaurants all over the place. Restaurants are making Mac and Cheese with asiago and truffle oil. Sandwich shops are making PB&J with homemade preserves and peanut butter.And it isn’t that unusual to see aged Vermont cheddar on some freshly made brioche bread to resemble the two pieces of white bread and Kraft singles that we grew up on. Even Elliot Graham Bowles made over the corndog at this years lollapalooza.

So where are chicken fingers at? Think about it. Ok, you may have seen chicken tenders on some bar’s menu, but was it anything to write home about. Granted, it is a rarity that I want something to get the gourmet treatment. I think quesadillas and grilled cheese are the best when prepared by people under the influence of illicit substances past 2am. But my once beloved chicken fingers (yes, I have grown up a tad bit) are being lost in the world of ‘foodies’ (cringe…) Someone needs to step up to the plate and re think this childhood staple. Is it really that difficult? Take some raw chicken tenders and soak them in Guinness or Ouzo for a day or two. Then get some frosted flakes, tortilla chips or dried peasant bread, grind that shit up with some fennel seed, anise, cayenne, cumin or whatever. BAM! Gourmet Chicken fingers.

Charlie Trotter, you’re welcome.